friends

Friends. I have missed them. Moving around can create that sort of pain. Pictured above are me and two of my dear old friends. Both of them might kill me for posting this picture on my blog, but then again, I pulled it off Facebook.

From 6th grade through junior year of high school they were two of my best friends when my family lived in Fresno. Oh, Fresno, your palm trees and endless summer....I hardly knew ye.

I talked to Kathleen for the first time in a long time on Saturday. It was amazing how easy it was to connect after not seeing each other for six years. Things have changed dramatically in both of our lives... we're both married and we barely scratched the surface when it came to catching up. The conversation was so natural, and it was very encouraging to talk to her.

Lately it seems as though friendship has been popping up all over my days, painting them with the bold colors of new friends and the well-loved soothing tones of the old.

I tend to let my friendships fizzle a little bit as time and place change. I don't really like making phone calls, they stress me out. I'm sorry if I don't call you as often as you would like me to, it's one of my stupid phobias. In fact, I wish I called you more. I'm sorry.

God really uses friendships in our lives, the new ones and the old ones. It is comforting to me to know that even if I don't see some of my friends ever again, the ones who trust in Christ I will be reunited with in heaven. And our friendship will be what it was meant to be on earth... we won't hurt each other through miscommunication anymore. No more tears.

I pray that my friends that don't know Christ will come to Him. Heaven's waiting, and I hope to see them there when all is accomplished.

I love you friends, may your days be filled with joy and peace in Christ.

lovely monday

Dear Week,

This Monday has been lovely.

1. A less stressful day at work, new energy to go on.

2. A lox and goat cream cheese sandwich.

3. Pretty clouds.

4. Homemade pizza.

5. A night at home with Tim.

6. Joy.

7. Realizing, the good gifts from today were from God. Thank You for a lovely new beginning.

Hope your Monday has been blessed. What are some things you are thankful for this week?

phalaenopsis

I really love orchids. It might be because we had some sweet dendrobiums in our wedding. I think they are absolutely lovely. To my shame, I have an orchid plant that has been knocking on death's door for the last few months... but Tim let me get this new phalaenopsis so I could try again. Hopefully this one will last longer, and I will get better at taking care of my sweet orchids.

to my mother

You are wonderful Mom. Your care for your children and example as a woman who follows Christ is inspiring. You have listened and loved through every circumstance. I love you.

"Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: "Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all." Proverbs 31:28-29

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

listening

I like ears. I have a slight obsession with keeping mine clean, and I like to look at my loved one's ears (I'm sorry Tim). Don't worry, I keep this obsession limited to my little siblings and my husband. Enough of my ear eccentricities.

It is interesting how the ear is connected to the mind.... physically my ears are always open, and at times they seem closed as ever.... because I am not listening.

I have always practiced selective listening skills. In the past I have been very successful at tuning out loud children, music, roommates, teachers, and pastors. I get caught up in my own little world of thoughts, dreams, and study.... what have I missed out on?

I know that I have missed out on conversations with my little sisters, whose sweet little voices I simply responded to with a "Mhmm, did you ask Mom?" or "That's good," or something of that sort. I have missed out on great sermons, I notice this when everyone has come out of church with something to say but me. Recently I was in church and I caught myself thinking for several minutes about.... bicycles. How lame is that?

If you have ever been in a conversation with me, and I asked you to repeat what you just said, this is my public apology. I'm sorry that I didn't listen to you. Please forgive me.

Unfortunately, I know that this listening problem has been all over my relationship with God. I have prayed so many times without listening to Him. I have rarely asked Him to speak, and it is even more rare that I wait to hear Him, for more than a minute or two. How depressing a conversation that must be to hear twenty "Please's" and five "Thank you's" and call it a day.

I write my prayers in a journal, and this can make it all too easy to have a one-way conversation with God. A couple times now, I have prayed differently. I stop midway and ask the Lord to speak to me... and then write down the things that come into my head. It has been both affirming and convicting. And I feel like it has brought me closer to God during the few times I have done it.

I'm going to try and practice this more often, this intentional listening. I know that it has benefited my relationships on earth.... and I have already seen it deepen my relationship with God.

If you are feeling a little distant from Him right now, try listening to Him.

If this makes you nervous, or you are worried about practicing this kind of listening with God, I understand. I worry that I am just going to make up stuff that I want to hear. The good thing is, by writing them down, you can weigh their truth. If you wrote something down after listening that is contrary to what is in God's word, it is probably safe to say you didn't hear Him say that to you.

It isn't always easy to be a good listener, but in a relationship, it can make all the difference.

how to let go when dinner burns...and ground beef goes bad

Anybody else out there want to be the perfect housewife? Maybe you don't. Maybe you feel like it's not important. Or homemaking is not really your thing. Or you are a man. In any case, I would like to be a perfect housewife.

I thought I had the perfect training to be the best one to ever hit the scene. I grew up the oldest of eleven children... learned how to cook and bake in mass quantities, learned to clean and wash, iron and mop, make things by hand, and use herbal remedies.

I was set, right?

Unfortunately, with all this training (thank you so much Mom), I still made some errors.

1. It took me 3 tries to make chicken noodle soup. The first time I boiled the chicken too long. The second time I made the broth and never got back to it (this gave me one stinky pot to clean). And, finally the third time, we had it, one of the crown jewels of homemaking...chicken noodle soup.

2. I fed Tim the saltiest taco meat, with enough sodium to give him high blood pressure for life.

I sadly pushed my plate away that night and said something terrible that I would rather not say again, "This is unedible."

3. I've let ground beef go bad before I froze it or cooked it several times. Each time I tossed the tray into the can with disgust lamenting my poor skills and bad meat memory.

There have been other gaffs, those three are my favorite in the kitchen.

It really is a shame that I look up to Martha Stewart so much, always pleasantly looking across her countertop saying sweetly, "It's a good thing." I forget that she also has a thousand hands working for her.

It's easy to look in a magazine, or see someone else's immaculate home and feel like you don't measure up. And maybe it isn't the food you are worried about, but the decorating, expensive furniture, or overall grandeur of your home. Or maybe you just wish you could pull off that high heels with a cute apron look.

Like everything else, I need to learn that my self worth doesn't depend on the cleanliness of my home or the excellence of my roast beef. My confidence must rest in Christ, not on any earthly thing. And that is how I let go. Now, that's what I call a "good thing."

flowers!

Even though pink hasn't been my color of choice since I was about five years old, the beautiful flowers that have been blooming in gorgeous shades of pink and purple have made me rethink pink.

I have fallen in love with magnolia trees this spring. I really enjoyed seeing them bloom in our neighborhood this year.
I can't remember the name of this lovely little yellow flower.... if you know, please enlighten me.
Rhododenron or azalea maybe? I have been trying to learn the names of all the flowers that I have been enjoying on our walks.... then maybe I can plant them in my own garden someday. For now, I'm happy with my little window garden and taking photographs of the lovely flowers in my neighborhood. I'm excited to see what will bloom after this weekend's rain!